Balloons

When we were preparing for little Baba's birthday, I noticed that Jojo had a phobia of balloons. She didn't want to be near the balloons and she was basically almost in tears with the balloons. As I probed further and asked more questions, she was afraid not of the balloons themselves but rather them floating away.

When looking at her fear, I realized that it's with the most of us. We're not afraid of certain things in itself. And honestly, she loves balloons when they are not filled with helium! So what are our fears? Is it the thought of losing the very thing that we love so much because we're afraid that it might float away from our very hands? That's what I'm sort of facing now. I'm very afraid of things floating away. But I don't want to love them too much and grab them too tightly that they burst in my face. Neither do I want to let them go. So what do I do now?

I really don't know. I hate it when things are in my hands and within reach and I've to let them go. But maybe it's the letting them go that I'll come to realize what God has truly prepared for me. Well, in short, my summer is ending on a low in the sense that my vision of life has once again become foggy and I've really got to lean on my Heavenly Father to guide me through this fog.