Money

Before you judge or have preconceived ideas about me, read first. To me money is important, it's nice to have but it's not the most important stuff on earth. Anyway, there has been a couple email exchanges with a dear, dear friend and also someone close to me via msn that started me thinking of the issue of money.

I've a very close friend whom I grew up with. She's my oldest friend and someone that I can pour out my soul to and she never once judged me or have turned me away. She has also been supportive in everything. She told me that she has been raised to marry a man that can take care of her needs and that she does not have to worry about anything. Well, that's nothing really wrong with that notion.

Then just yesterday, a male friend told me via msn that women should stay at home and let the men be the breadwinner. Apparently he and his wife had a tiff over some issues. Don't know what the issues are. He ranted and raved that he's provided everything for his wife and she's still not happy with him. And he did say a couple of other stuff that I would rather not type.

With these two thoughts, I wonder. Where do Babe and I stand? Before coming to HK to work, Babe provided for everything at home in Singapore. He paid for everything and he even gave me a shopping allowance. Then, one day, he found out how much I've been shopping and yes, the allowance stopped and I had to learn to be responsible for my extravagance. Was he mad, sure, he was. He did help but at the same time, he did remind that I can't buy everything on earth! Moving to HK, we contribute towards the household expenses together. I won't say equally because we don't count. We just pay for things together. It doesn't matter for us.

Money is good to have. It buys food and provides for stuff which is great. But what gets to me is how some people use money as power in a marriage. That would sting real bad. Just because the husband provides for the family, it doesn't mean that the wife can't get mad with the husband at all. One of my cousin's husband gave up his job to care of their child and they have a great relationship because they don't count the pennies. There's no expectations that my cousin-in-law has to buy expensive presents for my cousin. There has to be respect. Mutual respect for each other. Just because one earns lesser than the other, or one doesn't earn at all, it doesn't mean that that person doesn't deserve any respect.

I love Babe because Babe loves me regardless if I work or don't work or buy him something nice or not buy him anything at all. I love him all the same if he buys me a bag from Gucci or buys me a wallet from Ladies' market in Mongkok. At the end of the day, it's the thought that counts.