There's so many things that I would like to thank you for. I'll start first with the abundant and bountiful blessings that you have showered upon me for the last 35 and 364 days. Yes, I said it, I'm one day away from turning 36.
Last night during Plus (care group), we were asked to share about our most difficult period of our lives and what came out of it. I started to think real hard, Lord. It dawned upon me that those times that I perceived it as difficult and dark, were actually not that bad when I look back and reflect. I started to search in me my most difficult time that I had to question my faith in you. And it came. Two Mays ago when we were matched with a child. Yes, Lord, it was the single most difficult decision that I had to make. While making that decision I felt that darkness and sadness engulfed me and I felt totally alone. The person I love the most was not on the same page as me and deep down in me, I knew I hate to submit. I wanted to be Job's wife. I wanted to curse you and die. But in that most difficult time, you spoke. You calmed me down and you were there with me. And a few months later, Babe started to see you in a different light. He started to become a more Godly husband. Like I shared last night with the ladies, I'd gladly give up one child, two children or how ever many as long as you are turning Babe into a more Godly man. I'd rather have a Godly husband than have children and have a husband that does not know you.
When I think about my life, Lord, I've seen Your beautiful hands shaping mine and Babe's lives. I remember when I was seventeen and I was praying that Babe will be the one and yes, Lord, you gave him to me in your time. And it is in your time that you made everything beautiful. I'm so glad that you have given Babe to me. If I have to do it all over again, I'll still want you to give Babe to me. I'm ever thankful for this caring, loving man that loves me unconditionally. I know Lord that there are times, actually many times that I can and could have been a better wife but I'm still learning. Every day with Babe is a learning process in a loving environment. Even though we went through a really difficult patch two Mays ago, we have grown to be stronger in our love for each other. Lord, I pray that our love for each other will never fade but rather grow stronger every day.
Lord, you know there's one request that we've been praying earnestly. I was really praying that it would be the greatest birthday gift but I believe you have other plans. Jesus, we know that you want us to adopt and that there is a Joash or Janelle out there for us. And it is in your plan that we will claim that child one day. Of course, I wish the one day will come sooner and quicker but I believe that you have a purpose and reason for everything and I just have to trust in your perfect timing. But Lord, if you can give us this wonderful present for our wedding anniversary, we would be beyond elation. Or, we wouldn't mind Christmas, it'll also make a wonderful Valentine's present too. And yes, even Mother's day. But whenever it is, Lord, we know, like meeting Babe and waiting for the right time to be married, your perfect timing is all that matters.
So Lord Jesus, all in all, I just want to thank you. Thank you for my wonderful parents and sisters and little JC. I want to thank you for all the spiritual and material blessings that you've given. My life is full because of you. Thank you for everything. I mean everything, including sadness, discouragements, disappointments along with all the happy stuff. My life is complete because you gave me ups and downs. I'll never want my life to be anything else. I love my life because you hold my hand and walk through the journey of life with me. Thank you, Jesus.
In Jesus's name, I pray,
Amen
No comments:
Post a Comment