Sunday, January 06, 2008

Reflections and Resolutions

Been thinking and reflecting of the year that passed so quickly that I can't believe that a new year has arrived. Like in one of my previous posts, I wonder, what have I done, learnt and achieved? There's lots, I guess and maybe too much to blog about.

One of the highlights of the year, we got Happy. And she brings happiness to our lives! Very corny, I know. Another highlight, the decision to adopt. Will keep everyone updated on that as well. Made a trip to the States to see my cousins and best friend. And most recently, renewed friendships with friends from uni that I've not seen for years.

The past year was a year of trusting the Lord. Real trusting. Somewhere in the middle of the year, Babe made the decision to take a break from work as he was very unhappy with his job. Having prayed about it and thought hard over it and discussed about it, he tendered his resignation letter without having a job lined up for him. The plan was for him to do his masters, put the adoption on hold and basically, trust God for everything. But the reality is that whatever we plan may not be in God's plan. Well, Babe had job offers coming in and eventually after praying, he took up a job that allows him to commute to Singapore on a regular basis. Praise God for it! And it was a job that he didn't even apply for. God really works in ways beyond our expectations.

I've learnt a lot on friendships too. Early last year, Michelle, one of my first friends, went back to Australia. And late last year, Martina went back too. I do miss them heaps as they were one of my 'real' friends in HK. There were some friends that I let had to let go because they were just not worth it but at the same time, I made some really nice friends too. As the saying goes, you lost some and you win some. Over the years and months, I'm beginning to be tired of superficial friends. It's tiring and time consuming. Not worth the time. But the truth with friendships is that every friendship starts off on a superficial level and over time, it builds up. But I am thankful for some friends that I met in HK that make my life a lot easier. I am also thankful for friendships in Singapore. There are friends that make an effort to keep in touch with me and they make me feel a lot at home whenever I head back to Spore. And my church friends, it is nice to know that some of them read my blog and they make efforts to make me feel at home in Galilee. Friendships are time consuming to maintain but it is worth it. I'm always thankful for every nice new friend I make. But having said that, I've got my fingers burnt with some friends but does that put me off friendships, no, it makes me more cautious but really, I don't care. Sometimes, when the friendship is just not worth it, it's time to let go.

Resolutions? Well, one of my resolutions every year, is to be a better person. But how measurable is that and what's the definition of a better person? I don't know. Let's just say, I'll try to be less mean! Not even sure if that's possible. I do have an acid tongue at times. Part of being a better person resolution is to try to spend some time with my godsons whenever we head back to Spore. It was a great joy to see both of them growing. maturing and becoming more sensible. Of course, I am sad with the other godson who is a little lost but he did make an effort to see me and spend some time with me.

There is a possibility that we may become parents this year. So another resolution of mine, is to be a good mum. This is going to be a difficult one because it is never easy to be a good mum. All I hope is to be able to bring up a child in the Lord. That's all I ask for. Everything else is secondary. We'll be attending the second adoption workshop next Monday and we'll be putting in our paperwork as well. So everything is in the hands of the Lord.

Last resolution, to be a better wife. Yes, go on and laugh! I know this sounds silly and corny. But I have to learn to let go and not get mad and then go into a rage. I have to really learn that. Babe is great husband, and I honestly cannot complain. But I admit that I get stuck in the negatives and then I'll dwell upon it and stew and get mad and finally get into a rage that I can hardly calm myself down. So I've to learn to let go and think of the positives whenever I get mad with Babe.

All in all, last year was a great year. A truly blessed year. What this year will bring, I don't know. God knows and I've to continue to learn to trust upon His goodness. If He saw us through last year, He can see us through this year as well!

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