Wednesday, June 05, 2013

Sisterly Love

A couple of girlfriends told me over dinners on different occasions that how they used to be close to their sisters but over time living in different countries, they aren't as close as before. And even Babe's brother, well, the brothers aren't even close to be begin with and it's even worse now as his brother at times seems more like an acquaintance than family. And I started to think about my sisters.

When we were going up, due to situations and circumstances over the growing up years, we were very close. I was and am still rather protective of sisters. In some ways, being the eldest in the family, I sometimes and actually quite often become the mother hen and want the best for my sisters. In my teens, I would bring my sisters out with my friends, well, not really my friends since we grew up in the same church. Sometimes, I would give my sisters advice or pass certain comments but it's all done in love. Sure, once in a while, we don't see eye to eye and there has been screaming matches but at the end of the day, they are my sisters and I love them.

A few years ago, when Joanne had Jojo, I was over the moon! Jojo almost feels like my daughter. I would buy her clothes and it's almost whatever she wanted and she wants, Babe and I would get for her. And now Jo Meimei arrived, again, I'm so excited and can't wait to see her. Kinda bummed that we're not going to make it for Jo Meimei's first month party. Jacqui's getting married in December and of course, I'm all excited for her. We whatsapped about the wedding and go through hotel packages, dresses, and what not. There's always stuff to check on and talk about. Almost never ending.

Whenever we're back in Singapore, there's always places and things to do with my sisters and the kids. Joanne and Jacqui would think of stuff to do with the kids. There's almost a never ending list of things to do with my sisters. When I needed help with Baba, Jacqui flew over so that I could go on a couple trip with Babe. I can't even remember an occasion that I needed to catch a cab home after landing at the airport. One of my sisters would be there to pick us up. In short, my sisters are there for me whenever I need them.

But when I think about what my friends said about not being as close as before to their sisters, I reflect upon my relationship with my sisters. I've spent four years in Australia and now, about seven years in Hong Kong. I missed Joanne's engagement party and I hated that. When I chose to live overseas, I made an effort to head home quite often and now with Facetime and whatsapp, I make an effort to communicate with them almost every day. And I'm sure my sisters do the same. They make the effort with me. Joanne wants Jojo to know me. My great fear when Jojo arrived was that she'll never know me. But that fear is no longer there. The smile on her face, the spark in her eyes and the shouts that I get from her at the airport, is beyond description!

Jacqui is moving away from Singapore soon. And sure, there's a little of reluctance on my part. I know that I'll see her less, Baba is going to see her less too. And yes, I'll miss her. But I'm supportive of her and I want her to go and be happy. I'm excited for her starting a new life with her soulmate. But I know that I would need to make sure that Baba will not forget his Yeeyee Jacqui. It's cute sometimes when Baba randomly ask about his Yeeyees.

And on that thought, I do feel sorry that Baba will not have that experience of having siblings. Babe is pretty certain that he does want another child. And I respect that decision. Sometimes I wonder who would Baba talk to when he wants a listening ear other than his parents? Who is he going to confide and share about his crushes and about his naughty teenage stuff? I had my sisters. The closest thing he has to siblings are his cousins. And since we live 3 and half hours flight away, would he really grow up to be close to his cousins? Yes, it does sound silly and frivolous but it matters to me. And hence the reason why we fly home so often. I want Baba to know his family. Someday I may not be around but there's always family that will look after him.

Meantime, enjoy these photos.