Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Living Overseas

Woke up this morning with an sms from Veron. She popped Ashwyn out last night. So happy for her. Been wanting to call Vanitha for ages and well, since I had time this morning, I called her.

We chatted for a long time. She was one of my friends from work. Note, I used the word, friend from work, not just an ex-colleague. And she makes really yummy cakes too! Her husband and her live in Perth now. It's hard for me knowing that it's going to be rare for me to meet up with her. I'm not much of a Perth person, you know?

Well, back to my post. It's fun living overseas, nice having an experience, an adventure but at the same time there are cons. I remember when I was doing my masters, I missed my sister's engagement. And this time round living in HK, I do seem to miss quite a bit of stuff. I really want to see Veron's new baby but well, that has to wait for another 5 months. Stan is getting engaged this weekend as well. Me missing that....He's like my best friend. But don't worry, I'll be back for his wedding. And there are little things that I seem to be missing out. Seeing Marcia's little girl, watching my friends' kids growing up. But I guess, I'm getting used to it.

Looking back, I've been in and out of Singapore since I was 21 and been missing a lot of stuff that went on with family and friends. But then again, it's part of life. It's the choice I made and I guess, I've to live with it. We had a farewell dinner for Michelle last night. We had a good time. It's funny when you look at it, Michelle leaves and we'll miss her for a couple of weeks and then life goes on and her absence will hardly be felt. Isn't it the same with me? I mean when I left, everyone said goodbye and then within a few weeks, everyone's life goes on. My family and friends have gotten to the fact that I live in HK now and it's not a big deal anymore.

Anyway, enough of my rumbling. Oh, watched Charlotte's Web yesterday. My take home from that show, Wilbur was able to look beyond Charlotte's hideous looks and be friends with her. It's something that got to me. How many of us are willing to go beyond just looks? I have to admit, I can't but I'm learning. And like I always say, everyday is a learning process.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Drugs or Emptiness, Which is Worse?

Thinking of the movie that we watched yesterday. My current cutie, Daniel Wu, said this in the movie, it's emptiness that drives people to take drugs. And he continued, so which is worse, emptiness or drugs?

It is also an irony in the movie, the guys that run the drug syndicates, do not take drugs. To them, it's just a business. And this brought me to think about the legal vice industries. WK used to be in the alcohol industry and he didn't drink as much and it's the same with some of his ex-colleagues. In the tobacco industry, it's the same. Most senior executives there do not smoke. I have to say this even though I know that I must have mentioned a million times, thank God that WK left the alcohol industry.

Back to the question, which is worse, emptiness or drugs? In my opinion, it's emptiness. If one did not feel empty, one wouldn't have to turn to drugs. I don't have many addictions in my life, thank God. But I do have to admit that there are times that I have an issue with shopping. Whenever I've a bad day or I'm feeling a little down, I feel the need to shop. To me, buying something makes me happy. Wait, it's not about owning or possessing the object itself. But rather, it's the process of just bringing the item to the counter and having the sales person passing me the package and then there's a high. And the high may just last a couple of minutes. Brutal truth, when I get home, I don't even look, care or want to see what I've bought. I've never tried shooting up before and neither do I want to try it. Maybe an addiction with drugs might be the same. It's the emptiness that drives one to crave for a high. But once getting that high, there may be regrets. Yes, I've regrets with my purchases. Sometimes I wonder, what possessed me to buy that hideous looking thing!

Over the years, I've learnt and am still learning to cope with my shopping habit. I know that it's nothing compared with a drug addiction. But at the end of it, it boils down to the feeling of emptiness. And yes, conclusion, emptiness is the bad guy.

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Portege

Watched Protege today. It was good. Protege learns from drug lord and protege turns out to be a rat from the cops. It was a good show. Liked it. But what got me was the little girl in the show. Jane, the little girl had junkies for parents. Guess being in my profession, kids that are in these environment get to me.

But you know, the irony of all, someone really close to me, someone that I grew up with, someone who is almost like my brother, is putting his kids through it. Strange how life turns out to be. WK left the alcohol industry because he finally realized at that point of time that he was in a way selling poison to people and for that, I really respect him for it. I hardly even smoke these days. Can't deal with mothers who smoke when their pregnant or when they smoke around their young kids. So when I saw the kid taking the needle from her mum in the show, it really got to me. Do parents who do drugs understand what their kids are going through? It's hard you know? I remember seeing this person close to me shooting up, it really hurt inside knowing that he'll probably remain a junkie for a long long time.

For obvious reasons, I'm not going to name him. But if you're ever, ever reading this. Get off that shit! Your kids need you. How long more do you expect your mum to look after your kids? And you know what's worse? Mum told me that she saw your kid who is only 14 drinking in front of her and he's started smoking as well. Am I surprised to hear that? No, honestly, no...Absent father, kid probably knew that dad is a junkie, so what's smoking compared to shooting up? So if you're reading this blog entry, it's time to come home. Your mum and kids need you. We're here to support you. My family is always and will always be there for you. You're like a son that my parents never had. Come home, we love you!

Friday, February 23, 2007

Hobbit....





Thought I'll blog a little about Hobbit since I'm suffering from Hobbit withdrawal....Miss my Hobbit heaps and heaps. Hobbit is living with my parents now. She's keeping them happy, I guess. She's probably the closest they might get to a grand child! Mum spoils her to bits. When we were back in Spore, Hobbit was over the moon. She was so so excited and happy. When I started to pack, it seem that she somehow knew that we were leaving. In the morning yesterday, Hobbit was basically sulking and not really wanting to look at us. I guess she knew that we were leaving. It's hard. I really want to bring Hobbit over to HK but at the same time, since we're not sure how long we'll be here, it might not be such a good idea. WK was mentioning that maybe Hobbit might be happier with mum as she has friends there. But I think otherwise. I think she'll be happy with us. We'll see, I'm planning to bring her over in summer. Let's see what happens.


This pic was taken in Hong Kong MTR Station. Well, this goes to show how crazy Hongkongers are crazy over Hello Kitty.

I had high tea with Michelle at The Peninsula. The Peninsula is like The Fullerton or Raffles Hotel. Very ritzy. Well, it was nice but I think Fullerton serves better tea. Michelle is leaving next Friday. Will miss her. She's almost like my first best friend in Hong Kong. It's a shame to see her go. Opps...pardon my bra as well.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

CNY in Singapore

Tonight is my final night in Singapore. We've been back for about a week and it has been truly great. It has been great spending time with family and friends. Ate heaps and heaps. Ate so much to the point that finally, my body is saying that it's enough! Can't seem to eat anymore today.

This time coming back to Singapore, I seem to have more time meeting up with some friends but then again, time is never enough as well. Didn't have time to really spend with Pat and Stan. Met Lina briefly at Mum's place. Next trip, friends, I promise that I'll try to spend time with you.

Met up with some ex-colleagues, and let me say this, for the record and not off the record, I am truly, truly, truly glad that I've left my ex-workplace. Think I will not be able to deal with the competition and the rat race. I am much happier with the pace of work now. Ha, less than half the work that I used to work and double pay, why wouldn't I be happy? I don't think I'm ever cut out for the competition and climbing up the corporate ladder. To me when I started teaching, it has never been about climbing up the corporate ladder. To me, it's more about the children and yes, it's has always been and will still be about the children. They are my clients and my employer, is the Almighty above. And that's how I view my vocation in teaching.

We're heading back tomorrow. As usual, each time I head back to HK, I have mixed feelings. In a way, I'm glad to head back. I do like my life in HK. But at the same time, I miss my family and friends and I'll miss my Hobbit big time! Next trip, I should be back in Jul and Aug. Till then......I miss you all!

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Valentine's Day

This is our first Valentine's Day in Hong Kong. Actually, after 10 years of courtship, 4 and half years of marriage, Valentine's Day seem to be just a day that we exchange presents. We don't even really go out for dinner anymore. Oh no, I forgot, last year, we went to No Signboard for crabs....yumm....crabs....just thinking of it...it's making me drool....yum...stop...back to blogging. This Valentine's Day is slightly different as we're in HK.

Valentine's Day is pretty big in HK. Well, working around in Central, I saw flower delivery people delivering flowers and men and women holding bouquets and bouquets of flowers. Must admit that I wish I got flowers too. But well, WK is not really into sending flowers. He thinks that it's a waste of money. Not really sure if I agree with him. And truth is, I spent something like 6 hours in the hair salon today...Yes, 6 hours! I had breakfast there, 2 krispy kreme donuts (my favourite donuts). I walked like 20 mins to get them and so, I kinda earned my donuts. And WK delivered a fillet-o-fish to me for lunch. Dinner, we went to a local fish ball restaurant. Like I mentioned, VD is big here. Every opportunity to make money, the Hong Kongers will grab it! Dinners will costs a bomb and I do agree with WK that why should we conform and be subjected to expensive dinners that may not be yummy.

This got me thinking. Of course it's nice to have a nice present. Yes, still waiting for my present from WK. He got a nice ipod. And go for nice dinner on Valentine's Day. But why should it be limited only to Valentine's Day that we show love to each other. Like most experts would say, what's the point of being nice just for one day and be a jerk/bitch for the rest of the year. WK loves eating and so do I. Sometimes he'll surprise me by bringing me to nice restaurants and it makes it even more special or sometimes, he'll buy me something...Actually, he's a good husband. He buys me quite a bit of things. I'm really glad to have him.

WK is my best friend. I'm 32 and we've been together for 14 years now and that's almost half of my life. Sure we have our ups and downs. I've a terrible temper and when I get mad, I get really mad. And he has his temper as well. And I'm stubborn, yes, really stubborn and WK puts up with everything. Like Pastor says, a marriage can be heaven on earth or...hell on earth. Obviously, we strive for a heaven on earth. But making that work, it's a lot of hard work. A lot of giving and taking, a lot of understanding, figuring things out, and heaps more. But at the end of the day, it's all worth it. I still get butterflies in my tummy sometimes when I see WK....But sometimes, it's hungry butterflies....

Have to stop...I'm just rambling away...Sorry, I'm hungry...trying not to eat..And yes, I'm heading home tomorrow!!! Can't wait to eat!!! Yes...Eat!!! And Happy Valentine's Day!

6 Months in HK






Today is my 6th month in HK. How do I like it so far? I guess, I'm fine at this point of time. I like it here. In terms with work, I feel that I'm lots better off. I was talking with a few ex-colleagues and I'm glad that I left and came to HK. Work at my old workplace is no longer fun and people are working a lot harder and well, things seem to have changed there as well. And I guess that God must have planned it well for me to leave Spore.

As I approach into 6 months of being in HK. I started to think what's in store for me as well. I think too much all the time. I've got 18 months more to go on my contract and I wonder what's going to happen after that. I don't think that I'll be ready to head back to Spore after my contract. I guess money is a motivator and also the workload working for MOE does not appeal to me. But then again, it's too soon to decide.

I've been spending quite a bit of time with WK. Well, a lot more time than when we were working in Spore. I've been going to the gym as well. Actually, not as often as I would like to. So, in a way, my life now is a lot better and a lot more balanced. And money wise.....yes, I've been better at clearing my debts too. Ya!!!

In the last 6 months, I've made 2 trips back to Spore and 1 more in a couple of days. Made 2 trips to see Grandma, which i admit is not enough. I've made new friends and 1 is leaving soon as well. Made more friends from Geoexpat as well. And the pics are from tonight's ladies out from Geoexpat. So in other words, my life in HK is a lot better than in Spore.....but I guess, at this point of time, this is how I feel. But then again....things might change in 6 months' time.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Visiting Grandma

We went to visit Grandma in her village yesterday. WK came with me. It was his first time visiting rural China. Was interesting for him.



The first 4 pics were taking on the way to Grandma's place. I was just taking random pictures along the highway. Each time I go visit Grandma, it's interesting to see new buildings popping up.
This is Chang An. From what I understand from the driver. It's about 1 hour from Grandma's village. This is the closest to a city in Dong Guan. Apparently, it's where the rich in Dong Guan live. Well, honestly, I don't think I'll be able to live there though. I'm a city person...This is way too rural for me.
On the way to Grandma's Village. It looks like a nice quaint little park.
Some real huge thingy which looks like a banana to me. This monument or sculpture or whatever it is, is near Grandma's place.
The driveway to the hotel where we got off and catch a cabby to Grandma's place.
In the lobby, pardon my ugly clothes. Have to blend in with the locals, you know....
Some new mall sprouting in Grandma's city. But check out the name. Smell City??? What on earth is that? Smelly mall??? Can't they call it something like Fragrant City or anything better?
Another mall. Sometimes I'm torn between modernisation, pulling down and building new buildings and keeping the old. To me, lots of history disappears and then people tend to forget what was there before.
My Grandma and me! We took this before we left in the lobby of the hotel.
Grandma and me in front of the huge, huge blossom tree. Don't know what kind of blossom tree.
Grandma, Wee Kiat and me. WK has not seen Grandma in about 7 years.

The trip was really good. I love spending time with Grandma although I should have gone and seen her earlier. WK had a little shock with being in rural China. But all in all, it was a good trip. I think Grandma must be glad to see WK and me. Grandma was not feeling too good recently. I guess it was the cold that might have gotten to her. Well, she's fine now, I think. We walked like for a long, long time. She brought us everywhere. My legs are still tired now.

I chatted with Grandma quite a bit and I want to know more about her before she goes home with the Lord. She was born in 1912. Well, she's not sure really when her birthday was. She was the youngest in her family. If I can remember correctly, she had a brother and probably 3 sisters. And trying to remember what she said to me, her siblings have passed on. Not really sure though. She left Liao Bu, Dong Guan in China when she was 13 with her sister. And when she was 21, Grandpa and her got married. They were married for around 40 years. While talking to her, it is obvious that she misses Grandpa a lot. Honestly, one part of me wants her to remain on earth and not go to heaven. But then again, won't that be selfish of me to want her to remain on earth when she came return home to be with the Lord and to see Grandpa again.

Isn't life hard at times? We want things for our selfish reasons and not see the bigger picture. I really have to make a lot more effort to see Grandma more. It's better to spend time with her now when she's around. Grandma, thanks for everything and we love you!!!

Friday, February 09, 2007

Pics and Some Thoughts.....

















I went out on 7th Feb to a party with the Geoexpat members. It was great fun with the girls. Enjoy the pics. Look at me, I'm smiling so much that you can hardly see my eyes!

I've been thinking quite a bit recently. To be brutally honest, I've been having issues with my weight. I never really realised that it can hit me this much at times. I guess, everyone knows that I love, love shopping. It's one of my greatest pleasure. But in HK, it gets to my self-esteem a lot. I remember ages ago, talking to Pauline (a classmate from uni, who lived in HK), she was telling me how one of her friends actually turned anorexic living in HK. I can see why and how it can happen. I've always had issues with my weight and over the period of time, I thought that I'll just learn to love myself and my body. But living in HK can get really hard. There are days that I go shopping, looking for clothes and when I get home, I feel really shitty because I couldn't fit into any clothes.

I've always thought, well, as long as I love myself and I'm healthy. But then, after living in HK for a couple of months, it's getting harder and harder. There's always this pressure to lost weight and be skinnier. I don't want to end up buying clothes from the plus size section or from the maternity section. But then again, I wonder, could it be me. Went shopping yesterday and I ended up trying jeans from the men's section and well, one pair didn't fit me at all. And it doesn't help when WK can eat and eat and still lose weight. Sometimes I wonder how long more before I give into temptation to join a slimming centre or end up so called eating fat busting pills. I understand that there's no shortcut to losing weight. I just have to put in more effort in going to the gym.

Well, that's my story for now..Wanting to lose weight and then again, I love to eat too....It's like a battle of good and evil. Good grief. I've to stop obsessing with losing weight.

Monday, February 05, 2007

My Funeral

No, family and friends, don't worry, I'm not dying.....Not yet, actually, not that I know of...Well, it's just one of those posts again....

Watched Chinese Restaurants yesterday and the narrator interviewed this guy and 2 years after his interview the restaurant owner died. What touched me was when I saw the number of people that attended his funeral. It was an amazing turn out. I always believe that a person's success is not measured by the number of people that turns up at his or her wedding, birthday parties but rather his or her funeral. People who turn up at a person's funeral are people that were touched in one way or another by the deceased. In the Asian context, funerals are taboo, bad luck and many would shun going to funerals. I remember going for Adrian, Derrick and Uncle Vincent's funeral and there were heaps of people. Their funerals serve as reminders to me to lead a life that is worth living for.

Sometimes I wonder what sort of legacy will I leave behind when I go. What will people remember me by? Am I the bitch that swore at everyone or am I the person that people enjoyed my friendship? What will be remembered as? It may not be important as I'll be dead. But it is important as it shows the person that I was. And that led me to think of my own funeral. What do I want it to be? I admit, I am morbid....yes morbid to the point that I may be crazy. Well, like Eve said, she'll never find another one like me!

Whenever I go for a funeral, I always remind Joanne, my sister, that at my wake and funeral, make sure that everything is pink. Pink, remember....Tell people to come in pink and black. No white, white makes people look fat. Make sure I have a pink coffin and tell people that if they want to send me flowers, make sure that it's geberas or daisies. I tell my sister all these because I don't trust WK with such things. He might be too distraught and not remember such details. So family and friends, remember, pink is the colour for my funeral.

I remember once telling mum that if ever that I'm on a life support machine, please shut it off too. Don't waste the money, I'd rather be in heaven. Why bother to let me suffer and people around me to suffer? And yes, remember when you're visiting me, please accidentally trip and pull out my plug!

I'm not depress or anything like that. But rather, I much rather face life as it is and face it and live it. There is no point being afraid of death. And whenever I read stuff and watch stuff about death, it never fails to remind me to lead a godly and right life so that my legacy lives.