It's Not Time Yet

Jo Meimei arrived about a week ago and of course, I'm all excited to be aunty again. But at the same time, I'm bummed that once again, I won't see her grow up. When little Jojo arrived, I was almost in Spore once every month because Babe was living in Spore at that time so to a certain extent, I did see her grow up.

It's these times that I wonder if it is time to head back to Spore for good. I don't want to miss out on Jojo and Jo Meimei. Since Baba is probably going to be the only child, I want him to get to know his cousins and be close to them. I miss home at times. I know even though I've lived overseas for more than a quarter of my life, I still miss home once in a while. I know Babe misses home too. His family has been through some tough times. His grandma and aunty went to heaven last year and we just got news that his other aunty is in stage 4 cancer. A couple of weeks ago, Stanley, my bestie, who has moved to San Francisco asked when do we think we'll be moving back. And I guess that's when I started thinking a little about home.

But then I realized that the truth is that I'm not ready to move back to Singapore yet. Babe did mention the possibility of a Bangkok move but I don't want to move to Bangkok. I'm happy in Hong Kong. It took me a while to settle into Hong Kong. Took me time to figure out friends. Took me time to have friends that are family now. And it's these reasons and more that I don't think I want to move to another country. And to move back to Spore, I really don't know what am I going to do when I head back. I don't want to teach in Spore and if I don't teach, I really don't know what I can do.

Importantly, we don't hear God telling us that it's time to head home or head elsewhere. I told Stanley, we don't know. We don't think God is telling us to go anywhere at this point and when He moves us, we will go but at this point, Hong Kong might be home for a while.

It's so sweet to see Jojo caring for Jo Meimei so tenderly. My prayer for little Jo Meimei, may she be a woman after God's heart and a God fearing woman.

Dear Jo Meimei,

Although I've not met you, when you were conceived, I've already love you. I prayed for you when you were in your mother's womb. I wanted her to call you Sunshine but she thought that I'm a little bonkers to do that. But Jo Meimei, I know that you'll bring sunshine to the people around you. I'm sorry that I may not be able to see you as often as I would like but remember that I love you and will always love you.

Love,

Yeeyee Jasmine