Fragile and Flaky

Each year as I approach Christmas, I get into a pensive mood. I have this habit of reflecting on my year, how I've lived it, have I done my best and what have I done for the Lord. Well Christmas is so close to the end of the year that it always hits me and I get all reflective. Didn't help this year when my boss wants me to do a reflection of what I've been doing for the school.

When this end of the year, I've been reminded that life is so fragile. Yati's mum has been sick since summer. When I went back in August, she was in hospital. I met Yati's at Sharon's wedding, she was still in the hospital. I gave Yati a call last week and she mentioned that her mum was getting a little better and coming out from ICU. So I thought, that's good news. On Monday, I texted Yati asking her to meet me for breakfast when I get back next week. And an hour later, Mazzy texted me to say that Yati's mum passed on. I was on the bus, a little shell shocked. This is life, huh? You really never know how it ends or how it starts. And that was one of the times that I wished so so hard that I could be in Spore to be there for Yati. But I guess, this is life, you can't have it all.

On Tuesday night, I had dinner with a couple of ladies for Christmas. It was nice. On the way home, I was just chatting with Marina and some issues came up and she asked if I was decluttering my friendship wardrobe again. I told her, I do that on a regular basis now. I love my friends in Hong Kong, don't get me wrong. But sometimes I'd rather not deal with flaky people. I'd much rather cut away all the bullshit and ask, so, do you want to be my friend? But this is so stupid. Friendship needs time to grow but living in HK, sorry, sometimes I've no time for it to grow. I want instant friendships. I want friends that will be willing to stand by me now! And I mean now! Gee, I know I'm unreasonable but I want it now!!!!

Sorry, I'm just been ridiculous again. Oh well, the spirit of Christmas might be driving me a little mad. I'm looking forward to Spore but not to the mad traffic and people...thank God Babe has managed to put us up three nights at Fullerton Hotel and two nights at Mandarin Oriental. Strange that we're going home but not exactly to a physical home....