Altruism or Being Selfish

altruism noun willingness to do things which benefit other people, even if it results in disadvantage for yourself:

selfish adjective DISAPPROVINGSomeone who is selfish only thinks of their own advantage:

Taken from Cambridge Dictionaries

Was at the gym today. Trying hardest to work out and lose some inches. While on the ski machine, I looked through the window and saw some kids playing at the playground. This may come as a surprise to many. I remembered as a kid during an oral exam, I was asked, what do I want to be when I grow up. Think I must have been around 12 or 13. I told the teacher that I wanted to be a mother of 2 or 3 kids. She stared at me...eyes almost popping out....How things have changed. Twenty years later, do I have any desire to have kids at this point of time? Well, in a way I do. I want to adopt a child. And truthfully, I wonder if the desire to adopt a child is truly altruistic. I've always thought of adopting since we got married. Not that we can't have kids. Well, we never bothered to try for kids at all....If anyone is wondering. I remembered visiting grandma about 2 years ago. She brought me to an old folks' home to have a look. There I saw this cute little girl. Real cute and she had a large bump or lump on the side of her face. Grandma asked a couple of questions and from what I understood, the girl was left at the door of the old folks' home because she was born defective...That brought up the desire to want to adopt. When I tell people that I want to adopt, people always ask or assume why can't I have my own. Most tell me that I should at least try before adopting. But then what makes the adopted child to be? Firstly, adopted child probably had parents who can't afford therefore gave it up for adoption or the child doesn't have parents. As it is, the child is somewhat not really wanted. Now, imagine, that the child is already not really wanted and then gets adopted into a family that really wanted a child of their own and then maybe along the way, parents can concieve and have a child of their own...so how would the child feel?

Well, altrusim....why do I want to adopt? I want to save a child from poverty....But then again...is it for my selfish reasons? Is it a way for me to adopt and have a mini me....my own little behavioural experiment? Why do I really want a kid for? Or why don't be altruistic and make my mum and mother in law happy and have my own kid? Wonder if there's a fine line between being altruistic and selfish?
Why don't I have a kid? I don't want a kid because I'm selfish. There, you have it, my truthful and honest answer. WK and I are happy the way we are at this point of time. We love the lifestyle that we lead now and basically, we don't a child to rock our boat. Or is it the fact that I've been working with kids that I don't want a kid. Or maybe for the fact that I've studied Special Education that I get worried that I might have a kid that has special needs...So isn't that selfish of me? I remembered Aunty Sue said this to me, Don't have a kid unless you are able to give love unconditionally....We took 10 years to get married....Well, maybe we might need another 10 years before we really decide to have a kid. By then, I should get my thoughts sorted out....being selfish or altruistic. My two cents' of philosophy thoughts here....


Well, good news....WK got the job offer today! Thank God for it! They even gave him more than what we expected. This is so exciting. WK is going to talk to them more and figure out when he's going to move to HK. I'm so happy for him! He's coming in 9 days' time.